The ex-expat, a crazy-cheap budget, and my lazy a**

Living abroad and coming home has presented fascinating challenges.  Since I made the choice impulsively, with all the chutzpah of a heroine’s epiphany in a romantic comedy–Yes, I must quit my job and fly somewhere spontaneously for a subjective personal … Continue reading The ex-expat, a crazy-cheap budget, and my lazy a**

Whiskey, Kaitlyn, & Sex: #RealTalk.

Sorry for the delay!  I’ve been in the midst of moving continents, which has put me back a few weeks. Collated, overdue thoughts:  Regarding Kaitlyn Bristowe, the Bachelorette who got roasted for sleeping with a date in Ireland before the creepy, voyeuristic “overnight/”Fantasy Suite” (FML) nights: I must admit, I despise the man she slept with–one of the eventual “front-runners”–because of his skeevy, manipulative ways.  But as I watched the episode long after the controversy had started, I decided that critics of the young woman* were stupid.  Why?  Because she was in Ireland, drinking tumbler-fulls of whiskey.  WHISKEY, people!  The … Continue reading Whiskey, Kaitlyn, & Sex: #RealTalk.

To all Christians defending “traditional marriage” and “the faith” and the “old, godly America”

The reasons that Christians are giving against gay marriage on Facebook are bullshit. I am also too much of a coward to trigger a debate ON Facebook about this. I am “coming out” in terms of my support for gay marriage and increasingly liberal views slowly, one in-person conversation at a time. Days like today, however, break my heart, so I’m going to take my sarcastic bent and hope that someday in the future, I can say these things to the people who post messages on Facebook about how they will follow God, even if no one else will; and … Continue reading To all Christians defending “traditional marriage” and “the faith” and the “old, godly America”

A deep and unseated pain.

When I was sixteen, I was struck by Psalm 12:5 one day as I was reading: “Because of the devastation of the afflicted, because of the groaning of the needy, Now I will arise,” says the Lord; “I will set him in the safety for which he longs.” I felt a powerful connection to this verse and felt an almost visceral conviction that this was what I needed to do with my life.  To be honest, I actually thought I heard a voice say “in my spirit” (in my head), “I will use you to do this,” but however nutty … Continue reading A deep and unseated pain.

Men are stupid.* Love is a b*tch. And I might be one, too.

* Some of them.  I also have some very nice, smart friends and family members who are male. This post is not about them. A couple of weekends ago, I was able to meet up with someone new to Beijing, a friend of a friend who is starting a really cool business here. He is 25, several years younger than me, and the whole talk reminded me how dumb we are in our mid-twenties. It turns out that this very nice young man had fallen in love with a friend of a friend, formed a long-distance relationship, and just met … Continue reading Men are stupid.* Love is a b*tch. And I might be one, too.

(Some) Christians be spies.

Imposter [emo poem to read before the actual prose, if you’re inclined] She’s gorgeous, first: bright lips, silk hair, slim face Articulate, with an accent to boot Borne from some world apart from U.S. trace She captivates with every salted word But I—plain-spoken by her silven voice— Withdraw from her still-patronizing gaze Her words are subtle, but I know their tone She tries to make converts of our mixed realm And I, who have removed myself from there, Feel like a person privy to a spy False seed; discomfiting knowledge; and sad; I cannot think of any word but “bad” … Continue reading (Some) Christians be spies.

“Try,” Part 2: In Which I Try to Explain Why I’m Not Such a Bad Person

I woke up today feeling bad, like I went to bed with a “10” blog post and woke up with a “2” (yup, I just quoted Katy Perry). It seems especially snarky to take aim at a blasé-but-nice song, especially by quoting the relative benefits of the things Caillat disses, when there are so many greater evils in the world. Rather, I think I should have focused on the more insidious side I mentioned at the end: lumping in grown-ass women with adolescent teens experiencing their first flush of hormones, or not experiencing them soon enough, in a world that … Continue reading “Try,” Part 2: In Which I Try to Explain Why I’m Not Such a Bad Person

On patronizing bullsh*t. OR: It’s my body, I’ll make it look good if I want to

Remember “Try” by Colbie Caillat? This super-empowering song has been adorning the airwaves for a year now, but I have a beef with it. Kind of like John Mayer’s “Daughters,” it gets stuck in your head and sounds vaguely kind until you stop and pay attention. The funny thing is that I’m usually, or at least used to be, attracted to songs based on the lyrics. Still, for whatever reason, it took me a few rounds this time to notice. Important note: the lyrics are incredibly appropriate for twelve-year-olds. If you are stuck in a sixth-grade mentality about life, then … Continue reading On patronizing bullsh*t. OR: It’s my body, I’ll make it look good if I want to

On Narcissism, Sociopaths and Gone Girl

Last night, I finally watched the film based on the best-selling novel. I’d heard enough horror stories about the dark content of the tale to actually be underwhelmed, but felt the whole thing delightfully disturbing. Kind of like the ending of a Criminal Minds episode from this past season, when (spoiler alert!) a Manchurian Candidate kind of guy goes to his psycho mom for advice after she tries to kill his wife. Or, you know, like the two years I was married, except not as delightful, more disturbing, and generally hellacious (of course, my former partner didn’t kill anyone. Just … Continue reading On Narcissism, Sociopaths and Gone Girl